sorry for the lack of updates.

i dont blog cos my heart is dead.

hello people im back again!!!! exams ended about a week ago. its been awesome. hahaha.

welllll. it finished on friday. had some korean buffet with zoe and xuan. the side dishes were so so. but the meat was awesomezzz. we had a huge plate of beef bulgogi. it was marinated well, and pretty tender. there was bbq pork belly and chicken too. i ordered a bowl of noodles thinking the portion would be small. but nooooo. it was a giant bowl of noodle which i couldnt finish but there were nice chewy rice cakes inside. i love korean rice cakes :D had a really nice time talking to them, catching up and all. i kept sipping water in between conversations till i was really bloated. i swear its the worst i have ever felt after a buffet. i couldnt walk, i couldnt do anything and i felt so uncomfortable. went to toilet to puke some of the food and i felt so much better instantly. its like when i down alcohol too quickly. erghhh hate that kinda feeling.

the following evening, i met up with the evils and went home really late but had a really good time with my friends. great conversations and white wine, differing opinions, sharing. good times good times :) really love my old friends. hahaha.

so my parents flew off to taiwan already and i hope they will stay longer :( hahaha. feels like free without them. i think my brother feels even more of that. lol. nobody to nag, nobody to blablabla. for me, i felt a little independent, not having to have my parents keep worrying about whether i have eaten or not whether im coming back early. i know this stems from concern but sometimes it becomes a psychological hassle? my aunt has been checking in on us these past few days and its kinda annoying. we're not kids anymoreeeee. we know how to take care of ourselves, when we are hungry we will know how to find food.i think my relatives have a very vague idea of how competent i am with housework.

time passed really quickly for some funny reason this week. hmmm. i spent monday moping around the house. lol. met momo on tues and wed. tues dinner. wednesday was our 17th month :) once again, i think time passes really quickly. it would be one and half years for us on new year's day!! :) had a nice lunch at clarke quay. there's the 15 dollar lunch promotion for many restaurants along the river. we went to fremantle and had some western food. momo had fish and chips. the tartar sauce was realllly nice. i had barramundi with pumpkin risotto. :) the barramundi was awesome, but a tad salty. the pumpkin risotto was not bad. i found it abit too creamy for me and i hate pumpkins. momo went to catch pinocchio with his drama class while i roamed around liang court. me-time! went to kinokuniya to look around. i found some books that i may wanna get for myself for christmas! went down to tampopo deli to take a look. omg their cakes and pastries there look so freaking awesome. their cheese chiffon looks reallllly high!! went to meidi-ya, the japanese supermarket. there was quite a lot of japanese food products there. i think i might just go there if i wanna whip up some japanese food. they have all sorts of sauce, ready made food etc.

the weekends are here and im really boredddddd. today was spent gymming, grocery shopping and entertaining my aunts who came over. lol. shall go find stuff to do. have a good weekend! :D

im sitting in my classroom now , trying to figure out if im a boring person!
hahahah

er i think im not. im just not very happening.my social activities only include eating, baking (sharing with friends is considered social hahaha), meeting up with friends to talk cock, dating and checking out theatre shows occasionally.  i dont club. sometimes i feel a bit left out about not being happening. but... i dont exactly like to do the above. oh well. speaking of theatre, i didnt manage to catch suitcases by the finger players. erggggh. momo was too broke to go with me and it was too last minute to ask anyone out to watch. oh well.

i had an interesting saturday though. so momo's family holds quite a lot of gathering and we were invited to his cousin's 9th bday at downtown east's explorer kids. yeaaah. giant indoor kids playground. lol . but we didnt play in the playground la. only the kids did. it was total chaos. the 'adults' didnt do anything except eat. hahaha. there was a 'party host' who was in charge of the kids and she had such a hard time giving out instructions to the kids! we were talking about how its probably the worse job in the world. haha. it was over quite quickly.

at night, we went to changi beach and had a reaaaaal good time,

i did a merlion after downing beer really quickly though. it was really gross . thank goodness momo was there to make sure i was okay. hahaha. embarassing much even though he's my boyfriend. hahaha. i love you :)

okay people im gonna be on hiatus!

exams coming up in a weeks time. been spending the last few weeks jus catching up on work, assignments, readings etc. last week was spend catching up on reading and making sure my baby is okay from a silly accident hahahaah.

am gonna go study even more now. i swear my grades are so gonna be affected by the damn english modules.

backup plan are already in the works if i cant do my honours after year 3. yes, you heard me right.

and to lose weight after the exams. got pretty horrified when i stood on the digital weighing scale in momo's house yesterday. ergh. am disgusted with my fats right now.

okie dokes. need to go shit and start studying. on the other hand, i've completed the dreaded essay i have to hand in tml. sigh.

i cant wait to get my hands on a good camera next year cos i want so many keepsakes from  my life <3

okay im procrastinating a lot even though i have a lot of free time to start on my assignment. erggggghhhh,

i need a shower badly now. oily face plus hair. grosss ttm. oh well. currently waiting for time to pass so i can be done with today. i hate tues and wed!!

but well, i am done for the week. almost. favourite lecture plus lecturer for tml and im done for the week. shall use the rest of the weekend to catch up on work and readings.. that's all i ever do nowadays anyway! i've not been watching much shows. always so busy travelling to and fro school, baking or studying. tt;s my life people

speaking of baking, i am soooooo excited to try out a range of new recipes that i found online. all bookmarked, and ready for me try it out. heeheehee. so eggcited!! but the more i think about baking, the more the layer of fat at my waist reminds me i should be cutting down on sugar, carbs bla bla bla. sigh. i love to bake, but i cant eat too much of my baked stuff! growing fat.

i cant believe im nearing the end of the sem already. its been a relatively peaceful sem i have to say. for now.

im looking for a camera!! i wanna get a semi dslr cos im not that into photography? but i wanna take nice pictures and i am not satisfied with just a digital camera.i'm  looking at semi-pro cameras. okay fine i am a little interested in photography but i need a good camera mainly to take pictures of food. LOL. more like my baking la. i'm currently using my 8 megapix phone camera. which i am not satisfied with! haha. i am actually quite interested in getting the canon powershot s90. it has a matte black finish (i dont really like the shiny digital cameras around lol) and is a powershot camera! pretty costly though. shall save up/ask for it as a bday present for my 21st. heeheehee. whatever it is, i hope i can get it before i go travelling next year :) i've heard of how beautiful bali is.

i cant wait to be done with this year!

erm when i have 3 blog posts in less than 24 hours, it means i have a lot of free time on hand HAHAHA

goodness. its 12.18pm. i should be on my way home already!!!! cos i have no lesson today ladidadida.

i have yoga tonight. i cant believe i m starting yoga again. my on-off love affair with yoga started since i was 14 believe it or not.

once i have gotten a good gripz on baking, i will move on to cooking. :) just a random note.

have a good week ahead people! <3

i'm sitting on the carpeted floor of central library now , not doing anything remotely productive.

my project meeting just ended. nothing much came out of it except some light flirting between my 2 group members while i sit there and stone and try to make sense of the psychological journal i have to present this friday. and a million and one things fill up my head.

like what i needed to get done, what i need to print out, what emails i need to send, when i have time to go buy clothes even though im really broke. lol. slight instant gratification from having pretty clothes you know? but my wardrobe is bursting and i just got told off by my mum whose complaining about the lack of space in my wardrobe.

sucks to be me. i wanna bloody move out soon. i wanna grow up. i wanna have my own little space and haven , where nobody is there to seek out my mistakes and procrastination, where i can feel safe and happy. but unfortunately, this will always be a dream because i need to make do with these necessary evils of life. i am always making 'what if i dont get married' back up plans. hahaha. sometimes its quite stupid.

1. move out if i dont get married by 30. and worry about staying alone in an apartment by myself. damnit. i just heard spooky stories of spirits and stuff on saturday at the chic le freak naumi hotel. pretty pretty place!

2. sperm bank. this has been on my mind for the longest time. hahaha. i mean eventually, i want to have kids and if i dont have a man/penis/sperms, i cannot have a baby. so yeah. but i do not comprehend the full implications of raising a child single-handedly. so yeah, this is just something i've thought about and it may or may not form part of my back up plans .

that aside, while back up plans make me feel better about my future, the whole uncertainty of my own future is still pretty overwhelming. my dad was just going on about how he doesnt really approve of me dating at this age, because when i start to step out into the working world, my horizons will broaden itself and viewpoints may change in both of us. and when that happens, tension and friction occurs and eventually you need to overcome that or be alone. he thinks i shouldnt be putting so much into a relationship. but how do you do that? the ideas and connotations associated with a relationship spells commitment. and i've always believed that this is the period where you start learning about relationships between people, not just in a romantic sense. it maybe a working relationship, friendship, romance, whatever. this is the period where you start constructing the real concept of people and all the abovementioned and the 'skills' that you learn will come in handy when you take on the real world when you are not protected by education. of course, the real world is probably gonna fuck you upside down and make you learn even more.

but i;ve heard too much to know that not everybody grows up.  i dont know whether they are lucky or not. SIGH. BIG SIGH. whatever it is, i have a long long way to go before i can sit in my house looking withered and hopefully carrying my grand-daughter in my arms. i was just thinking about growing old today. i am looking forward to growing old. that marks a period of assessment of my life and what i have done with it and perhaps make sense of the purpose of our existence. provided i dont die of any freak accident before i'm 30 or sth. lol.

okay, enough of all these stupid ramblings. if you;ve made it here. good for you. lalalala. i'm gonna go and print stuff out, do mundane school things and get boring.

i am getting increasingly proud of myself with all the mental strategies i am using to cope with myself. no i'm not sick, i just need to improve as a human being. busy busy week ahead. shall work myself to death even if i have to. it will be worth it. another month's worth of work and i shall be free for a little while :)

let's hope the remaining of the year is going to be good. then i maybe happy for a long time, just for once.

ZZZZZzzZZZZzzzz.... waiting for the love of my life to call.

had a bad week. i didnt even bother with doing any school work today. i shall work myself to death next week (Y)